What is it?
I'm sure I am not the only one feeling things like this.
I think I need to write all of this down. *Spoiler alert*
How can someone be so engrossed into something that one is not even related to, not even connected, not even experiencing, and it seems one does, and it becomes so important, more important than anything else? It defines you, and you rely on it, you depend on it, and it gives you everything, it makes you feel everything, it frees you, it captivates you, it's your mind, it's your heart, your life.
I don't really know how to express this properly into words. I think no word can describe this thing exactly how I meant it but I'm going to try.
I love to watch movies. I love movies. I can reliably say that I am passionate about movies. And I love all those talented actors and actresses.
Sometimes I get too attached to the characters in a movie or a book that their feelings simply affect me so deeply. It helps if the words are beautifully written in the book or the actors are superbly talented. When they get sad, when the characters are sad, I sort of synchronize to their emotions quickly. I know everyone can relate to the sadness because everyone can feel. Some people can relate to it because they've been there before, they've felt it before, or because of some memory. But I'm not suppose to relate to it. I consider my life fortunate but these sorrowful scenes and expressions just make me collapse into tears. Well perhaps I'm just so emphatic or compassionate about what other people feel. And somehow this makes me feel like a total fool and embarrassed.
And yet I cannot deny that I enjoy it. Reading books and watch movies or TV series just feels like another gateway to a life so different from mine. A place of discovery, of creativity, of influence, of freedom, of emotions, of adventure. People who write these amazing stories are absolute geniuses.
Stories, that's what they are. They're stories. A mere fragment of imagination. An alternate reality that is nonexistent. A life that never happened. And the characters are pure fiction. They may be inspired from real people but again, FICTION.
Then why is it I feel so strongly for fictional characters? They don't exist, except in these stories, and they don't know I exist, how could they since they don't exist. It's just something that I cannot comprehend. How can you love fictional characters so much that it effects you SO MUCH? You know how I mean, you feel glad when they are happy. When they smile you want to hug them. When they are sad you feel like hugging them too. When they cry you cry with them. When they hold it in all you want to do is pat their shoulder and say 'It's alright, darling, just say it. Spit it out'. When everything happens to them, you feel everything. Gosh I have to say I am not good with words...
Like in Sherlock, I just couldn't watch Reichenbach Fall. The first time I watched it I just can't. It's too much for me. When I'm on tumblr and I see these gifs or images of poor Sherlock before the fall, he phones John and painfully say that he's a fake, and tries to give him a hint, and he says 'Keep your eyes fixed on me' and he holds out his hand, reaching his friend, and then he falls and lands and John comes running, not believing in the event that he just saw in front of his eyes, reaching for dear Sherlock's hand and feeling for his pulse. He feels that there is no pulse and the hand lies lifeless, people move the body and Sherlock's bloodied face is exposed, his head bloodied, his ears bloodied, his face. And his bold, blue eyes are as lifeless as ever, and I just couldn't take all this, you know what I mean? I could never see those images or gifs with a straight face. I could never see them without feeling all this heartache, regret, remorse, this grief. And why should I feel all this? I am not the characters in the story. They're not real. I've never felt real grief, yet I know how it feels. I feel all of these feelings that I shouldn't be feeling over a fictional character. This Reichenbach, like, this can't happen. This can never happen. But it does and I'm in denial and I huddle into a ball and bawl my eyes, wishing this to never happen but it already did so that's pointless and even more pointless is crying for a fictional character as if it's a real person. But there is a point. I just don't know what it is. Only that there is a point.
Of course, I know a whole lot of people feel the same way I do. Heck, the word Reichenbach has become an emotion, a universal feeling. Everyone knows how it feels like when they simply state, 'Reichenbach'.
Well this thing is not only limited to Sherlock only, but a great number of movies or TV series as well. It's just heart-wrenching and heartbreaking.
I haven't a tidy mind to think this all out. I'm fond of thinking, and like to daydream, but this kind of thing is out of my league at the moment. I couldn't understand why people could be like this. An explanation is most welcome. I think I did understand it one time ago, but I forgot and need some enlightenment.
I think I need to write all of this down. *Spoiler alert*
How can someone be so engrossed into something that one is not even related to, not even connected, not even experiencing, and it seems one does, and it becomes so important, more important than anything else? It defines you, and you rely on it, you depend on it, and it gives you everything, it makes you feel everything, it frees you, it captivates you, it's your mind, it's your heart, your life.
I don't really know how to express this properly into words. I think no word can describe this thing exactly how I meant it but I'm going to try.
I love to watch movies. I love movies. I can reliably say that I am passionate about movies. And I love all those talented actors and actresses.
Sometimes I get too attached to the characters in a movie or a book that their feelings simply affect me so deeply. It helps if the words are beautifully written in the book or the actors are superbly talented. When they get sad, when the characters are sad, I sort of synchronize to their emotions quickly. I know everyone can relate to the sadness because everyone can feel. Some people can relate to it because they've been there before, they've felt it before, or because of some memory. But I'm not suppose to relate to it. I consider my life fortunate but these sorrowful scenes and expressions just make me collapse into tears. Well perhaps I'm just so emphatic or compassionate about what other people feel. And somehow this makes me feel like a total fool and embarrassed.
And yet I cannot deny that I enjoy it. Reading books and watch movies or TV series just feels like another gateway to a life so different from mine. A place of discovery, of creativity, of influence, of freedom, of emotions, of adventure. People who write these amazing stories are absolute geniuses.
Stories, that's what they are. They're stories. A mere fragment of imagination. An alternate reality that is nonexistent. A life that never happened. And the characters are pure fiction. They may be inspired from real people but again, FICTION.
Then why is it I feel so strongly for fictional characters? They don't exist, except in these stories, and they don't know I exist, how could they since they don't exist. It's just something that I cannot comprehend. How can you love fictional characters so much that it effects you SO MUCH? You know how I mean, you feel glad when they are happy. When they smile you want to hug them. When they are sad you feel like hugging them too. When they cry you cry with them. When they hold it in all you want to do is pat their shoulder and say 'It's alright, darling, just say it. Spit it out'. When everything happens to them, you feel everything. Gosh I have to say I am not good with words...
Like in Sherlock, I just couldn't watch Reichenbach Fall. The first time I watched it I just can't. It's too much for me. When I'm on tumblr and I see these gifs or images of poor Sherlock before the fall, he phones John and painfully say that he's a fake, and tries to give him a hint, and he says 'Keep your eyes fixed on me' and he holds out his hand, reaching his friend, and then he falls and lands and John comes running, not believing in the event that he just saw in front of his eyes, reaching for dear Sherlock's hand and feeling for his pulse. He feels that there is no pulse and the hand lies lifeless, people move the body and Sherlock's bloodied face is exposed, his head bloodied, his ears bloodied, his face. And his bold, blue eyes are as lifeless as ever, and I just couldn't take all this, you know what I mean? I could never see those images or gifs with a straight face. I could never see them without feeling all this heartache, regret, remorse, this grief. And why should I feel all this? I am not the characters in the story. They're not real. I've never felt real grief, yet I know how it feels. I feel all of these feelings that I shouldn't be feeling over a fictional character. This Reichenbach, like, this can't happen. This can never happen. But it does and I'm in denial and I huddle into a ball and bawl my eyes, wishing this to never happen but it already did so that's pointless and even more pointless is crying for a fictional character as if it's a real person. But there is a point. I just don't know what it is. Only that there is a point.
Of course, I know a whole lot of people feel the same way I do. Heck, the word Reichenbach has become an emotion, a universal feeling. Everyone knows how it feels like when they simply state, 'Reichenbach'.
Well this thing is not only limited to Sherlock only, but a great number of movies or TV series as well. It's just heart-wrenching and heartbreaking.
I haven't a tidy mind to think this all out. I'm fond of thinking, and like to daydream, but this kind of thing is out of my league at the moment. I couldn't understand why people could be like this. An explanation is most welcome. I think I did understand it one time ago, but I forgot and need some enlightenment.
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