Nightmare in 2013

A nightmare greeted me on the first morning of new year. I was in a Battle Royale game, but things were a lot different. I do not know why I called it a Battle Royale game since the rules were so different. But it was still a survival game. I had that feeling, you know? It seemed that those participating had to play a number of sub-games and the person who won each game became safe and got to leave. However, the games become harder as time progresses, and brutal. I remember that the last few games were going to be like those in the Saw movies. The last one who could not win any of the games will be killed. So I was determined to win the first few games, but I did not. One of the first few games was climbing up a set of super steep stairs without touching the railings. The steps were inclined to a degree that it was almost a completely flat surface. I was trying to climb those stairs but I could not, and somebody else won that one. Then the stairs became a flat surface and it was really steep, another person won that one. I remember feeling really hopeless because that was the last game that would be categorized as easy. It was like, if I could not even win this one, how am I suppose to win the harder ones? I was really scared and miserable at the prospect that I might die a painful death. I was thinking that am I ready to die? I did not want to die yet. I was almost crying but I tried hard to hold it in and hid my face and teary eyes. In the end there was this game where two players had to work together to win it. There were players that were not participating in the Battle Royale game, it seems like they were playing just to make things more competitive. I'm not really sure how or what the rules were, but I remember that I was searching for things, papers or documents containing specific information. Some of the papers had scribbles, drawings, texts, and words with handwriting like a small child's. I also remember some biological drawings and some that I knew was drawn by me. It was so weird. Anyway, I got these papers and brought them to my partner at our 'base'. Then the game was over and the winners were announced. The first place went to a group that was not in the Battle Royale game. The funny thing was that they were my friends in real life. My partner was someone I don't recognize though. But my group got second place and somehow in the rules, we get to be free. I did not believe it at first but my partner reassured me and I remember crying so hard. After that I woke up to a bright morning. Actually, I have dreamed of this kind of game before. I was in this kind of Battle Royale game though the people were different. I had to play the game with the group one too, but I remember that in that old dream the group was larger with a higher number of people in it, like 5 or 6 people. I do not remember the outcome of that dream. But at least I got to make it out alive in this one. My emotions felt so real. I was wondering what would happen if such a thing would really happen to me. Will I die or will I live? Will I be so desperate to escape a painful death that I would kill myself? Am I ready to die? Have I done enough in this world? Something like that... Perhaps if I was in the real Battle Royale game, I am sure to die the way my physical strength is right now. I think I will probably be like Noriko. Maybe I will live until I meet Mitsuko or Kiriyama. I wouldn't have a chance against them. Well that is how I feel. So that concludes my new year post. It is not a very cheerful post, is it? Talking about death so early in the new year... Well Happy New Year. May this year be filled with happiness and good memories. Please let me enjoy my remaining days as a teen with glee. I hope this year will be a fruitful year for all of us.